Kill Zombie! [aka Zombibi] (2012) is a Dutch zombie comedy – wait, what? Did I just say Dutch zombie comedy? I don’t think I’ve ever seen a Dutch zombie comedy, or any Dutch movie for that matter. I did see the 1993 American remake of 1988’s The Vanishing which was helmed by the original’s director. Does that count? Probably not. Anyway, after seeing Kill Zombie!, I’ll definitely be looking for more Dutch films to watch.
Kill Zombie! [aka Zombibi] (2012) was directed by Martijn Smits and Erwin van den Eshof, and, stars Yahya Gaier, Gigi Ravelli, Mimoun Ouled Radi, Sergio Hasselbaink, Uriah Arnhem, and Noel Deelen. This movie is not a ground-breaking zom-com, but, it is a zany, wildly entertaining splatterfest nonetheless. Kill Zombie! works, despite being derivative of many other movies (not just of the zombie variety), because, at its core, is a cast of well-drawn characters and a charming almost love story. Kill Zombie! would fit quite nicely on a double-bill with the excellent British zom-com Cockneys vs. Zombies (2012).
The most charming part of Kill Zombie! is Gigi Ravelli as beautiful but tough policewoman Kim. Ravelli is a very lovely Dutch actress who is best known, in The Netherlands, for her role as Lorena Gonzalez on a popular Dutch soap opera called Goede Tijden, Slechte Tijden (2007-present). In Kill Zombie!, Kim is a badass heroine who becomes smitten with reluctant hero Aziz (Yahya Gaier) but not in an overtly head-over-heels kind of way. The relationship is delightfully sweet but subtly so since Kim is usually kicking zombie ass, while Aziz remains determined to rescue his girlfriend Tess who is trapped in an office tower. However, over the course of the film, we hope that Aziz will finally realize that adorable Kim is the one he should be fighting for (although she can certainly handle herself), not slutty Tess. Gigi Ravelli as a tough policewoman in Kill Zombie!, like Michelle Ryan as a badass safecracker in Cockneys vs. Zombies, makes good Shaun of the Dead-inspired zombie fun a whole lot better!
OK, let me now spoil Kill Zombie! for you with a way-too-lengthy synopsis …
Aziz (Yahya Gaier), a Moroccan, is a bored office drone working in an Amsterdam office tower. His only ray of hope is a date later that night with sexy secretary Tess (Nadia Palesa Poeschmann). However, Aziz’s unemployed brother Mo (Mimoun Ouled Radi) continually calls him at work, begging Aziz to join him at a pool party; and, because of the distraction, Aziz’s boss, who has his eyes set on Tess, fires him. Aziz reluctantly joins Mo at the party, only to thrown in jail with Mo and two inept Siranamese bouncers Jeffrey (Sergio Hasselbaink) and Nolan (Uriah Arnhem), after Mo accidentally hits the host’s girlfriend with a soccer ball. Soon, beautiful but tough policewoman Kim (Gigi Ravelli) throws thief Joris (Noel Deelen) in a cell, too; then tases both Mo and Jeffrey after they talk back to her.
Meanwhile, a Russian space station crashes into the office tower where Aziz worked, trapping Tess inside, and exposing the Dutch population to a breed of intelligent spiders that were artificially fertilized with alien DNA … no, wait – that was Spiders 3D! In Kill Zombie!, the derelict Russian space station exposes the Dutch population to an unknown virus which turns them into flesh-hungry zombies. Aziz, Mo, Kim, Jeffrey, Nolan, and Joris, initially, take refuge at the police station until a news broadcast advises them to move to a safe zone. Aziz receives a call from Tess pleading for his help, but, Kim convinces him to stay with the group. They set out in a police car, but are forced, by zombies, to take refuge in a sporting goods store, where they arm themselves… with sporting goods.
Favorite scene #1: Aziz, after receiving another call from Tess, attempts to rally the group to help him rescue her. They refuse, so he sets off on his own. Kim chases after him. “You won’t survive on your own,” she tells him. “We’ll see,” he replies, boldly, then starts to walk away. Kim stops him. “What do you care?” he asks. “Look at me,” she says, sympathetically, then asks him to pull up the guard on the helmet he’s wearing for protection. He does, and she punches him in the face. “Have you gone nuts?” she snarls. Then, she punches him in the gut.
Favorite scene #2: Mo and Jeffrey jump into an abandoned limo, and find English singer Ben Saunders [winner of The Voice of Holland in 2011], in the back, hiding from the zombies. Meanwhile, Kim saves Aziz from a zombie by knocking its head off with a giant wooden mallet. The head soars through the air and hits the limo’s windshield, causing Mo to accidentally kill Ben Saunders with his crossbow. He eventually becomes a zombie. Sure, it’s derivative of both Pulp Fiction (1994) and Zombieland (2009), but, it’s still just as funny.
After Jeffrey’s tennis ball cannon fails to achieve the desired zombie-killing results, the group takes refuge (again!) in a chop shop garage. During a scuffle with zombies, Kim is accidentally knocked unconscious. Mo, Jeffrey and Nolan follow Joris who has convinced them to rob a bank, while Aziz, with Kim unconscious, goes after Tess. Kim, at first, is impressed by Aziz’s devotion to his girlfriend until she learns, later, that Aziz’s first date with Tess was supposed to happen the night before. She punches him in the face, again, and storms off. Meanwhile, at the bank, Joris double-crosses Mo, Jeffrey and Nolan, taking all the money. Nolan is bitten by a zombie, and Jeffrey and Mo attempt to put him out of his misery. After several failed attempts to bludgeon him to death, they leave him. Aziz gets a call from both Tess and Mo demanding help, and is forced to choose between them. He chooses to save Mo first, but Kim returns to help him.
Favorite scene #3: Aziz, Kim, Mo and Jeffrey end up stranded on a climbing frame in a park. They are saved by the Barachi Brothers (Yes-R and Iliass Ojja), former kabob restaurant owners, who face off against the zombies in a video game-inspired throwdown, then drive off. Sure, it’s derivative of the amazing “epic of epic epicness” Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010), but, it’s still pretty cool.
The group finally makes their way to the safe zone, but, the Army refuse to go after Tess. So, Aziz, with Kim, Mo and Jeffrey, hijacks a Humvee stocked with major firepower, and races off to save her. At the office tower, Jeffrey holds off the zombies outside with a Gatling-style minigun, while Aziz, Kim and Mo go inside, after Tess. However, Aziz learns that Tess called every guy she every fucked to come save her, which pisses off both Kim and Mo. Even worse, Tess rebuffs Aziz after a former lover saves her first. Aziz ends up with Mo on the roof where a helicopter drops a Russian explosives expert who is immediately bitten by a zombie. He was sent to take care of the debris, and, thus the zombies who are seemingly drawn to the building. Aziz and Mo help the Russian set up the explosives, but, the Russian soon becomes a zombie, then bites Mo. Mo tells Aziz to go after Kim while he sacrifices himself to blow up the building and save the world. Well, Amsterdam.
Favorite scene #4: Kim, separated from Aziz and Mo, encounters Tess, who has become a zombie. Kim drops her weapons, facing off against Tess hand-to-hand in a lengthy, brutal fight. Aziz, after leaving Mo on the roof, finds Kim just as she drop kicks Tess’s head off, which Aziz catches. “Damn bitch, that girlfriend of yours,” Kim quips.
Aziz and Kim find Jeffrey running up the stairs, exhausted. They all race back down, exit the building, and hop into the Barachi Brothers’ car as the building explodes behind them.
Favorite scene #5: In the end, Aziz, Kim, Jeffrey and the Barachi Brothers return to the safe zone. However, before Aziz and Kim can share their first kiss, they’re dragged inside by Jeffrey only to find soldiers sucking the blood of the survivors. “Vampires?” Kim sighs, as the Barachi Brothers, armed with stakes, join them. “I hate vampires,” Aziz adds, as they prepare for yet another fight.
OK, if you’ve read this far, I have a bonus photo of Gigi Ravelli just for you, so click right here.
Now, watch the original Zombibi trailer here …